I realize that millions of men have been unfairly denied their families through divorce. I fully understand a father’s deep sorrow when he is unjustly forced to vacate the home he has worked so hard to provide for his family.
I profoundly empathize with a husband’s untenable situation when he discovers that his cheating wife has all of the legal cards in her pocket and that he is personally left with no protection due to the No Fault divorce laws
But, more importantly, I deeply sympathize with fathers who are legally barred from seeing their children, by their lying, ex-wife’s false accusations.
I understand their frustration, and rage, when these men discover that they have no ability to offset their ex-wives false claims because she has a powerful co-conspirator in her efforts to unjustly destroy her husband. This co-conspirator is the feminist-infested, family court system, where the “sisterhood”, circles-the-wagons, and deliberately seeks to cruelly deny innocent family men, their children, and their property.
My concern for these unfortunate men has always been intense, as Christian Western Civilization would collapse without the personal priorities of most of these good men, but my ultimate concern is for their children’s future, especially for their daughters.
Without their, sadly divorced-away, father’s influence, many of these young girls will make the same mistakes as did their mothers. As adults, they will unwittingly perpetuate the pain of divorce for another generation of children, as 69% of divorces are initiated by the wife. And, if the couple are both college graduates, the rate rises to 90%! “I am Woman, Hear Me Roar!”
In any event, whether or not you and your daughter are victims of divorce, the topic of divorce should be the starting point for a very serious father/daughter discussion.
A conversation that, if possible, takes place before your daughter reaches her thirteenth birthday. A conversation, that not only discusses divorce, but the feminist reason for its prevalence in today’s society and how to avoid becoming its victim, ever, or again.
Dad, you must sit down with all of your daughters and explain the life-altering differences between a life defined by the tenets of Christianity, and one defined by the “ideals” of radical, second-wave feminism, especially when it concerns divorce.
Your daughter needs to know that feminism, as opposed to Christianity, deceptively advocates for divorce among its adherents, as a means of female “liberation.”
I can assure you, that once this crucial discussion begins, it will ultimately become a conversation about good versus evil.
It is important to explain to your daughter that the tenets of Christianity, which are based on God’s teachings, believes divorce is SO bad for the men, women and children of our civilized Christian culture, that, despite what some feminist-infested Christian churches espouse, the Bible bans it.
Dad, you must also explain that the sincerely Christian churches prefer to educate, and train, youngsters and young men and women, to trust and respect each other’s core Christian values, especially those associated with marriage, before they are old enough to marry.
And, your precious daughter must understand that these shared Christian values are the only path to a happy, loving marriage between two people, since God, not man, created marriage. Without their commitment to the essence of the sacrament of matrimony first, and then their understanding of their individual God-given responsibilities within marriage, a couple will have a very difficult time establishing a life-long, loving, fairy tale marriage.
Your daughter must know that marriage is NOT for a “career-oriented“, selfish, egocentric radical, second-wave feminist who is looking to “express herself”, “have it all” or “do her own thing.” She must realize that becoming this type of female feminist will dramatically increase her chances that her life will prove to be pointless, and that her marriage will end in divorce.
Since most young girls, and young women, instinctually believe in the lovely, romantic fairy tale about “the knight in shining armor”, (all of them secretly hope to someday meet the “man-of-their-dreams”), tell your daughter that this will NEVER happen if she abandons her Christian faith and becomes a radical feminist instead!
Dad, unfortunately, most young women believe, incorrectly, that feminism is primarily about seeking “equality” for women, but as her father, adviser and protectorate, you must explain, right from the start, that feminism is NOT about “equality” for women, but is instead, about seeking inequality for Christian men. This treacherous deceit will ultimately deny your daughter all of the happiness she so rightly deserves as it puts her on a collision course with the Christian men in her life.
Dad, you must explain, that in reality, feminism steals young women away from God. And that despite its rantings to the contrary, feminism cares nothing for the feelings, or the future, of the women who adopt its disturbing lifestyle.
In fact, feminism cares absolutely nothing about the emotional, spiritual and physical toll it extracts from its adherents, and as proof, it deceptively promotes divorce, from “inconvenient” husbands, as “liberating”, when in reality, divorce is a debilitating, emotionally destructive trap for everyone involved, and is without any long-term advantages!
Continue by explaining that radical feminism is nothing more than a deceptive fraud concocted by non-Christian, dysfunctional women. Go on to explain that adopting a feminist lifestyle will, someday, lead to a sea of regrets about what could have been, but was not.
Whether your sweet daughter is trying to cope with your divorce, or is familiar with other children’s experience with divorce, the shocking realization that a painful divorce may be in her feminist future, will have an immediate impact on her still developing, and romantic, female psyche.
At this stage of her young life, your daughter still wants an affectionate, amorous, marital success, not a painful failure. Don’t disappoint her! Tell her that a happy marriage, to her “knight-in-shining-armor”, is NOT a fairy tale, but that it can come true! It can come true, just as it has come true for millions of devoted Christian couples before her.
Your young daughter must be told, as soon as she is old enough to understand, that adopting a lifestyle defined by radical, second or third-wave feminism, twists a woman’s thinking away from a joyful life defined by Christianity. A happy Christian life defined by the support, and security, that only traditional Christian families can provide to its members.
This young, sweet child of yours must understand that the “emancipation”, supposedly provided by feminism, will come at the expense of her own family. And, at the very least, will destroy her happiness, and at the very worst, will destroy her self-respect.
Opting for a feminist lifestyle can lower the bar of life to the point of hopelessness and tragedy.
Your daughter must see how embracing a “career-oriented” feminist lifestyle, rather than aspiring to remain a good Christian family woman, will wreak havoc on her life and the lives of those who love her, especially her Dad.
Your young daughter must be shown the destructive nature of feminism. She must understand that radical feminism promotes an unhealthy and unhappy lifestyle defined by self-centered individualism, adultery, humanism, abortion, explicit sexuality, single motherhood, divorce, cohabitation, promiscuity and illegitimacy, among other evils, rather than an unselfish faith in God, and a Christian devotion to marriage, husband and children.
She must see that divorce not only destroys families, but more importantly, it permanently destroys the children of divorce, by inflicting emotional pain, and negating their sense of security. This dramatic loss of security, which is promulgated by their divorcing mothers, is typically inflicted on the children well before they are old enough to understand the life-long emotional struggles its loss will extract from them, and from their future relationships.
Dad, if you are already a victim of divorce (divorce inflicted upon you by the feminist controlled family courts) your ex-wife’s radical, second-wave feminist tyranny must not prevail for another generation. Save your daughter from this same fate! Teach her about the threat radical, feminism poses to her happy destiny and to that of her future children.
Tell your daughter that it was her mother’s irrational adoption of radical feminist thinking that shattered your peaceful Christian family life.
Tell her that in order to avoid inflicting the very same pain and suffering upon her own future children, that she must embrace her Christian faith, right now, as a young girl, before she becomes ensnared within the tenacious grip of radical feminist ideology.
Tell your daughter that the only way she can hope to avoid divorce is to NEVER marry an unbeliever (or, it goes without saying, become one herself), because this will seriously threaten her ability to remain true to the tenets of her Christian faith.
Your daughter must also know that, despite what your ex-wife tells her, your efforts to provide for your family were performed according to God’s directives.
And, she must also understand that the 1960s, non-Christian founders of radical, second-wave feminism deliberately created a confrontational ideology based on their personal hatred of men. A hatred which was totally misplaced when applied to Christian men. A hatred which was based on their own dysfunctional, non-Christian upbringings, and as such, when applied to Christian men, are nothing more than twisted lies.
Your little girl must understand that despite the fact that millions of formerly Christian, gullible, female baby boomers have foolishly adopted radical feminism as their new age religion, that it doesn’t change the fact that feminism has nothing to do with the truth, and is in reality, just a pack of destructive lies!
Whether your daughter lives with you, or not, begin today to drag your daughter to daylight!
Take her to church, Sunday school, confession, Bible study, religious retreats! Take her to God, where she will be safe from evil.
Define your relationship with your daughter, though God’s grace. Be her spiritual adviser, even if you don’t have a clue where to begin! Even if you’ve lost much of your own faith. Don’t be afraid to express what’s left of your faith in God to your daughter because it is the only path to salvation for both of you, as directed by God Himself.
Don’t let your insecurities, concerning your lack of “expertise” in your faith, keep you from claiming your daughter for God.
Give it all to God!
A good place to start is by praying for her, and with her, and to continue by seeking a spiritual adviser for yourself.
Ask a priest, or minister, for guidance, but more importantly, continue to ask God for His help too. He will never fail you. You are His greatest creation! And, He loves you!
Once you, and your daughter, accept Christ as your Lord and Savior, God will keep your precious daughter safe, even when you cannot be with her, because her life choices will become easier and clearer. And the outcome of those good choices will produce a good Christian life for your daughter, which will be defined by joy and happiness, rather than a life defined by the personal travail caused by radical feminism.
So Dad, please, become your daughter’s spiritual leader. Pray with her, and pray for her. Guide her in the ways of Christ. And, at all costs, strive to save her from a fate worse than death – a depleted, debauched, disgusting life defined by the twisted ideology of radical, second and third-wave feminism.
God bless your efforts to save your daughter from the insidious evils inherent in anti-Christian, radical feminism.
Someday, she will thank you as never before!
Fantastic Post! I have lived what you wrote as Christian husband and father. Having my first wife have two affairs on me before her finally asking me to divorce her so she the divorce would be quick and she could marry her lover. She was pregnant with his child within 3 months of our divorce.
My older sons at the time were 11 and 9 but they were old enough to see there mom going out with another man while we were still getting divorced(she did not even bother to hide it). This left an impression on them that will stay for the rest of their lives.
A few years ago my daughter who is now 14(she was 11 when she found out) was also shocked at her moms behavior. Her brothers told her and she asked me about it and I did not lie to her.
I do not volunteer information to my children but if they ask the right questions I give them the answers they seek. Yet I have tried to teach them they must still respect their mother’s position even if they do not respect her person.
I demanded if she wanted a quick divorce that I get joint custody and she gave it to me. I personally think this is why my children have weathered this storm so well because I have been able to spend so much time with them. We talk about the Bible and God’s view of the world and marriage all then time.
I am so thankful that my 14 year old daughter looks to God, the Bible and to me as her father for her direction in life. In many ways she sees her mother as “what not to be in a woman”.
My sons I feel for. Because they are convinced that so many women are like their mother and they are afraid of not being able to find a good wife that has dedicated her life to God and follows Biblical gender roles. I try and encourage them every day that there are still gems out there, they just have to be patient and look for the right one – not just the first pretty girl that comes along.
But as far as my daughter goes – whatever Christian man asks me for her hand will be one fortunate man – he is getting a gem! She was raised with 4 brothers(two older, two younger) and with a Dad(me) that has invested a lot of time in her. She loves the Lord, accepts her gender role in God’s creation and she understands and ACCEPTS the male nature.
This is a combination that is so rare to find in a woman. She is very much looking forward to getting married and having a family and home of her own one day.
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She does, indeed, sound like a gem. Your commitment, through God’s grace, to her future happiness, is admirable. I wish more Dads understood how critically important they are to their daughter’s lives. And I wish more young women understood what a heartbreaking, and difficult, road, a life defined by radical feminism, is to follow. If these twisted women would just consider their children’s happiness before jumping off the cliff, but unfortunately the ideology of radical, feminism breeds self-centered, egotists who think of no one but themselves and unfortunately those kinds of women make the very WORST wives and mothers. I wish your sons well. I agree that finding a good woman today is very difficult, but they ARE out there. Your sons just can’t “settle”, on one. They must keep looking, otherwise they will spend their life in a sea of unhappiness deliberately caused by the woman they loved most. Sad. Better to never marry than suffer with that outcome. We lost my beloved son to a “beautiful”, hollow, empty, egocentric narcissist. Sadly, as Christians, none of us were experienced in this type of long-term psychotic deception and failed to recognize the truth until she was pregnant with their first child. She then showed herself to be such a lying, manipulative, corrosive influence that she literally split my family in half. It was, and still is, heartbreaking. Searching for answers to explain this evil woman’s behavor is what prompted me to begin this blog. My hope was that I might forewarn young people about these types of sick women, in hopes of saving others, from our fate, and her form of radical, third-wave feminist treachery. Thank you for your comment. It was enlightening.
Yes, this is well said! My own parents were divorced and a really pivotal point in my life was when my father not only took responsibility for that, he spoke to me about the importance of marriage, commitment, of rejecting these cultural notions of strong independent women who need men like a fish needs a bicycle. Without his honesty, his strength, and his willingness to tell me there was another way, a better way, my path would have been very different.
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